Saving Private Ryan and Coney Island

The beginning of last week was really not great. I was feeling really terrible and had to miss two days of work. My responses to the sickness were the following: 

1) Watching Saving Private Ryan in hopes of letting my body know that it could be in worse situations. You know, like being on the shores of Omaha Beach on D-Day. 

2) Napping like Michelle (she's the nap queen)

3) Talking to myself. Because why not. I'm great company.

4) Drinking these beverages: my sweet roommate made me Lipton iced tea, the iced black tea that I had made the previous day, and of course, my Nalgene bottle full of water miracle liquid.

I did manage to make it to the last day of training after two days of not moving much from my bed. Work was at Pratt Institute in Brooklyn this past week and the campus is beautiful. There are these statues on every green area and this one of a smashed piano was my favorite. I think it made me realize that my favorite images have a simultaneous brokenness and beauty to them. The fragility in something that is supposed to be rather sturdy is comforting in a way. 

On the weekend, Mj and I went to Coney Island!!

Because duh, I'm spending the summer in NYC and where else am I going to spend seven dollars on a ferris wheel ride and gawk at the nine dollar price tag on the deathly, wooden, yet still alluring roller coaster ride?

We had Grimaldi's for lunch. Yuum. 

We went on the Wonder Wheel.

Swinging > Stationary
But swinging isn't really conducive to taking photos...

...unless those photos are selfies.
Selfies: they're possible in any condition if you try hard enough.
Thunderstorm? Swinging many feet above ground? No problem.

I went a little crazy with the photo editing. But doesn't this look like it could be a postcard?

After we were done with Coney Island, Mj wanted to meet her friend, who was conveniently at a church near the boardwalk. We got as far as the vestibule between the front door and the place of worship. We said hi to her friend. The reverend/pastor thought we were attending service and kindly, but in slight distress, explained to us that we had to take off our shoes. Then, as he looked at our outfits, asked us, in a slightly more distressed tone,  if we had anything to cover ourselves... After explaining we just wanted to say hi to someone, we apologized for being underdressed for church and left. And that was how we almost accidentally attended the church near Coney Island... and probably embarrassed Mj's friend as well.

Daytime shenanigans over, onto nighttime shenanigans:

Brooklyn apartment with christmas lights and a view of Manhattan <3
Mj's friend had a housewarming party and the apartment was amazing.

Mj killing it at this warehouse where musicians were jamming and creativity was everywhere.
I played the drums for the first time, and now this girl thinks she, Mj and I are in a band together, haha.
But damn, the environment was inspiring. 

~~~~~

Prepare yourself for a rant that's mostly just for my purposes.

So I suck at posting regularly. I really do. I'm trying though. Diana signs me into Columbia's library and I work a lot better there. I hate how easily I forget to make the effort. I forget that even blog writing about the silly happenings in my life is therapeutic. Sometimes I go so long without creatively writing a single thing and there really is no excuse. It used to be such an essential part of my life. I really miss it. It's been a crazy year but that should be more reason to write (say writing one more time Dora, you haven't said it enough). I don't know who I'm trying to convince but this blog is one of my more persistent efforts to keep it in my life.

When I was a kid, I used to write stanzas, poems and songs that were drowning in metaphors and similes. I loved the mystery and ambiguity of it all—most of the time, I didn't even know what I was talking about with all the figurative speech. I loved making strange phrases, contradicting comparisons and stitching together words that had no business being stitched together. I didn't care that they made no sense. I didn't care that it wasn't organized with a beginning, middle and end. Works that were too neatly tied, knotted and too decided in its purpose made me suspicious.

I think part of me remembers how all of this made me feel and I still get floods of the satisfaction when I give creative, personal writing the time. But as I've gotten older, other things have started to take priority and I half-heartedly hate that I don't despise those things for replacing writing. Because getting settled in my freshman year of college on a different coast, being inspired by my classes and meeting amazing people wasn't a waste of time. Because declaring my concentrations sophomore year, applying for study abroad and loving my extracurricular activities to death made me learn a little more about myself every day. Because watching a ridiculous amount of TV shows/movies... well that one is my bad and I should really fix that. Excuses excuses I know, but I think it again goes back to effort. I just need to make it a point to allocate time to writing on this blog, writing songs and even writing this screenplay that I started but never looked at. Maybe now that I've written this goal down, it'll be more real.

Soo, see ya next Sunday, when I'm going to start posting regularly! xx

_________________________________

"so let's play 'til the day

burns the skin on our backs

and we've left all we can to the nights"
- Cards

Roaming back to Rhode Island

Last weekend, I took a break from New York and went back to Providence for friends and happiness.

And damn, I missed my friends and Providence (hey, two months is a long time). I think I was in denial about being abroad next semester and didn't realize this weekend could be my last time in PVD until next year. Which is stupid, because that's what this blog is about. 

But anyway, I think leaving town every once in a while is so important. For me, it's a reminder that you're never stuck. If you feel suffocated or some version of that feeling, just remove yourself and take a bus somewhere. Or do some variation of that. You can go as near or far as you'd like. The physical removal from a situation really helps with the mental removal. At least that's what I think.

Last semester, I took a weekend trip to NYC to apartment hunt and it was so nice to take a break from College Hill and school. This time, going from NYC to Providence, it reminded me what silence sounds like and that I cannot live here without breaks or weekend trips out of the city...at least out of Manhattan. Even traveling to Brooklyn will suffice as a break.

So, revelation time is over and I think it's time for photooooos:

Porch sitting/baby carrots consuming with Oliver, Aaron and Michelle.
They were insanely excited about my spending the weekend with them, as displayed by these expressions.
But hey, the poops picked me up from sketch Kennedy Plaza at night, so I know they sort of care.

Friday morning I had breakfast at Louie's (Loui's...Louis...?) with Johanna and Lauren, which was lovely.
Then I booked it to Steinert Practice Rooms and played/wrote on the piano for a while as Michelle worked and Oliver slept. Reminded me of freshman year when I lived on the same block as Steinert; Deionte and I used to go all the time.

Oliver and I decided to cook some of the many bunches of swiss chard that they had in the house.

Some of the swiss chard was wilting.
Oliver and Aaron insisted that the wilted leaves just needed a little bit of cradling and caressing.
So the cradling commenced.

I cook, therefore I am adult-like. 

Kale chips? Swiss chard chips? Same thing.

Honestly, all you need is chopped onions, garlic, salt, pepper, oil, your lettuce of choice and a baking pan.

So you should cut us some slack. We put eggs and swiss chard in the ramen. That makes it okay.
Oliver refused to use the flavoring packet, so his bowl was even more okay.
I love ramen.

Michelle, Oliver and I walked downtown along the river...

...to WBRU's MAGIC MAN CONCERT.

Extraordinary happiness ensued.

*And in case you're not yet convinced to buy their debut album, I'm just going to leave this beauty here:

"Honey" from Before the Waves

"Oh won't you break me open like the sky at the sunrise?"

This is my sophomore year roommate, Michelle.
Love her to pieces.

Michelle, Oliver, Aaron, his friend James and I went to a beach in Newport, RI on Saturday.
We spent hours lounging in the sun and frolicking by the water.
If that's not summer, I don't know what is.

I underestimated the sun and it burnt me like it was the last thing it was going to do. But it was worth it. I think. It's been a week and I've only just started peeling. Aiy.

I also got to hang out with Lizzie during the weekend, but didn't get to see Michael. Actually though, I'm so sad I won't be able to co-direct with these two amazing people next semester. Oh and our awesome three person hugs. </3

Also, I missed Kyle Will Adams because he was out of town.

Damn it, does this mean another trip to Providence?

Hmm.

...

(:

I'll leave you with this photo of Oliver's silhouette looking pensive.

"The Canadian is more patriotic than we are!"

Carolynn invited me to go to Brooklyn Bridge Park to watch the Macy's 4th of July Fireworks with herself and her friend Sophie. Sophie, who's from Vancouver, celebrated her first 4th of July with us! They were both so amazing and hilarious. I couldn't have asked for better people to hang out with.

I took out the DSLR for this event, and I am so glad I did. But even the fancy camera wasn't able to capture half the beauty of the show and the views.

There were these boats...

...and they were doing this.

Carolynn, Sophie and me.

Loungin'

"We look like we're photoshopped in!"

So I don't claim to be a photographer, New York is just that photogenic.
If ever there was a photo worthy of #nofilter, this is it.

Let the fireworks commence.

They were even coming off the Brooklyn. Freaking. Bridge.

In a daze.

I think I'm also going to start leaving music/things I like around this blog. Because why not.

Here is "It All Starts Here" by Magic Man, a band that I've been obsessed with for a while. Their new album is dropping July 8th. But they're streaming it for free here. Catch it while it lasts! 

NYC

Through books, movies and the internet, I thought I knew what this city was. I thought I knew it enough to want to live here after graduation, without questions and without qualms. I had romanticized expectations, but I think I always knew that New York and I would have a turbulent relationship.

There has been more than enough in these past three weeks that has caused me to rethink my previous idea of New York. I hate the way honking is everyone's main method of communication: be it for anger, for lust or for business. I hate the tantalizing and crushing dreams housed by these people and, let's face it, by me as well. The tangibility of the desperation, talent and poverty is suffocating. I hate that, as someone who is neither impoverished nor alarmingly wealthy, I can taste both as if my life in this city can only end in either of those extremes. It doesn't take a genius to realize which is more likely. The seeming impossibility of any sort of moderation scares me. 

But on the other hand, I can't help but ultimately love this city. Being here forces me to be more. More creative, more independent, more resilient, more observant. And maybe that's being premature, as it has only been three weeks. But there's something about being here that is just immeasurably inspiring. My head's turning with ideas for projects after a long period of writer's block and a lack of any sort of muse. I've even grown to love the long subway rides because of the time it allows me to just zone off and think about various things without feeling too incredibly guilty. There is also nothing that cannot be cured by the view from Brooklyn Bridge Park or just looking up at the sky in the evening and seeing the lines and lights of the buildings. I hope I'll never tire of the views here.

However, it's one of the hardest places to first try and be an adult (paying rent, cooking, surviving), but as Frank Sinatra sang with deceptive ease, "If I can make it there, I can make it anywhere." Hah, the clichés are killing me right now, but I can't help it. Check out the song below, it really puts ya in a mood.

Not to make everything so metaphoric, but the only way I can describe the way I feel about this place is with these stupid love/relationship terms. There are things that I see everyday here that I despise, yet at the end of the day, I can't help but love the city unconditionally. It challenges me and it makes me better. But then again, maybe it's a phase I'll grow out of. An experience that'll be crucial to me moving forward. (I really can't apologize enough for this gross metaphor, hah.)

I think the most important thing that I've learned so far is that this is a place where you have to make an effort to go out, to try new things, to create opportunities for yourself. By nature, that's not me. I tend to be introverted and unless I'm comfortable in a situation, I separate myself. I've also found that I fall into convenience: be it with friends, activities, etc. The problem is that here, it is scarily easy to be isolated and conveniences aren't really a thing. (It literally takes an hour on the subway to get to most places from where my apartment is--talk about commitment.) I have to make a very conscious effort to not fall into my tendencies and I think New York throws me into the deep end, testing me and challenging my anxieties every day.

(But thank god also for Diana, who adopted me as a little sister and forces me to go out. She's getting her grad schooling on at Columbia Nursing School and we brought the café vagabonding from the Bay to NYC. She da bestest.)

I'm terrible at segues, so here's the exciting and less serious part of this post: pictures on my phone that are of barely passable quality and pictures from Diana's phone that are of significantly better quality. I've been too paranoid to drag around the DSLR. 

Anyway, without further ado, here are some pictures n stuff. 

First up, adventures with Diana. Checking out a park near our apartments and café hopping, as per usual. Nothing really beats Julie's but we tried.

Diana modeling.

Cafés. 

Just lines and lights when you look up.

This made me laugh and reminded me not to take life so seriously.
Nicole Loher's an adorable NYC blogger.

Oh hello cast of Orange is the New Black. 

OLIVER CAME TO NYC FOR THE PRIDE PARADE. He's one of my favorites. I missed him.
But da poop is in Providence for the summer.

 Honestly, this was another blitz photo post in an attempt to capture several weeks. Hah, but you get the gist. Once I got settled in and got over the homesickness, everything really picked up. I feel insanely lucky to be able to spend the summer here.